ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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