dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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