So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
