I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I deserve this hangover.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
