glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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