I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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