I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Randomize
