Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize