big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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