You can't motorboat a personality
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
my poor anus
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
