If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
