i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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