Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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