She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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