I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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