We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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