found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
