We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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