so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Randomize
