someone get that fucking seahorse.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
