420 ftw
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
