I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
