pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
