Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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