I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
