What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
