i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
