There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
