This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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