I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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