is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
