its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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