Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize