They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
