I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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