Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
