who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Life is so much better after having sex.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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