Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
