Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
