Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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