It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize