Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
