I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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