So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
