as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
