I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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