You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Randomize
