my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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