She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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