i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
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